July 5th, 2006


Leerning to speel, er, Learning to Spell

Hey Reader,

Would you mind telling me just WHY I spent $19,000 in student loans and FIVE years of my life in college getting an English degree when there are people out there who want to do terrible things to the language, like, oh, I don't know, simplify spelling until it no longer resembles ENGLISH?

I read this article that proposes we should spell things as they sound. Noooooooooooo. That's the WORST thing I've ever heard. If you read the article, you'll see exactly what I mean. The words don't make any sense, and you spend more time trying to figure out what they should be in regular English that it's just stupid. I can't imagine what possessed these people to think "You know, we should change the way the language is spelled so it looks like a five year old wrote it down in a card!"

I suggest that all of the people who propose this idiotic switch over to uninttelligible "English" sit down and read, cover to cover, the novel by Irvine Welsh, Trainspotting. It's a good novel, yes, but it is 95% in Scottish dialect, spelled exactly how it sounds. Here's a taste:

"Ah tap the cash and meet Mitch in the Hebs. Mitch is still seein that lassie Gail. It's obvious that he's no gittin his leg ower. Listenin tae um fir ten minutes, ye kin pure read between the lines. He's in pure bevvying mood, so ah tap some cash off ay um."

Just think, kiddies, the WHOLE book is like that. I have read it, cover to cover, in three days, all 344 pages of it. It is well written, a good novel, but can you imagine spelling your every day corrospondences like that? I think I would rather learn math than have to relearn everything I know about my own language. Honestly, I dare these people, convinced that life would be so much easier spelling like that, to actually pick Trainspotting up and tell me what it's about. I know that book, I wrote a paper on that book, I saw the movie, I discussed it.  Try me.

I must expunge the awful text from that article from my mind. It's terrible. I shudder to think of my language becoming THAT on a daily basis. Oi.

While I'm in a ranting mood, I did go applying today. I applied at all the places I said I would, only when I tried, three of them looked at me like I had grown an alien head or dog ears(I had to, just for Inuyasha) when I asked for a paper application. I feel like I dropped into this world from a different age, as if people totally forgot what paper was. On top of it, I wanted to apply to that local restaurant. They want a RESUME. No applications are there for you to fill out, they want an actual RESUME as if you were applying for some high end job. I couldn't believe it! I retooled the one I have, fitting it to their demands, and I will drop it off tomorow, but boy do I feel silly. Is it just me, or are we too afraid fo paper these days? I guess I just don't understand.

Just so you know, I am making headway on the story. I spent most of the evening and late into the night working on the story. I am so close to 3000 words, and I have not finished typing what I have written by hand two nights ago, so I know I have something to work with. I also had another great chat with my beta, and she liked the ideas I was putting into the chapter, so it is coming along well.  I shall spend tonight working some more on it, too.

Until next time,

Far Away Eyes